You Found the “Daddy Wound.” Now What?

That’s the big question, isn’t it?  You find the wound, you see how these desires were created in your life and you discover what it is that you truly want in life, what you want for yourself most of all.  You discover, if you’re a believer in the woundedness theory, how you were raised so strongly influenced those sexual desires.

Now what do you do with that?

It seems to me, and I fully confess that being in the middle of the process somewhat limits my objectivity, that you have two choices.  Both of which involve victimhood.  You can find that pain, deal with your past and the people who wounded you, and you can spend the rest of your life being a professional victim, constantly looking for more pain, more truth, more freedom.  Or you can be the victim, realize the pain and make peace with the fact that you’re on a particular journey in your faith, and then you can get over it.

Yeah, you heard me.  You were gay.  Then there ws Jesus.  And now you’re not.  You have the rest of your life to get over it.

Everything after your confession and repentance is a battle.  A battle between your spirit, which is good, and you flesh, which is sinful.  The you, the real you, the spirit inside which is the deepest part of you where you live, is now good.  You are a new creation.  Unless God has healed you instantly and permanently, the rest of your life you deal with the battle between the spirit and the flesh.  Did your daddy wound you?  Okay, we know.  Cope.  Don’t blame your father or your mother: they did the best they could at the time with what they had.  Release them.  Aim your spirit towards reconciliation and redemption.  Sure, there is a brokenness we must deal with and it sneaks into your life at the strangest moments.  But the thing that impresses me about the Bible, time and time again, is that it is about redemption: finding that which was broken, wasted, ruined…and making it good and whole and healthy again.

There is a path to finding your own masculinity and peace with the man you’ve become and the man you’re going to become.  I fully believe releasing your “victimhood,” your right to vengence, and finding a path through those issues.

That’s where I am today.  That is the battle I fight.  And through it, that is the peace I live with.  I pray you’ll find it too.

~ by WriterRand on December 15, 2006.

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