No, not the Ryan that used to live with me. Another Ryan. And a special prayer request today.

I can’t give you identifying specifics, but a very kind family is brokenhearted today about their missing son, Ryan.

Ryan grew up in a household that loves Jesus. Today Ryan is a completely unrecognizable man. Once a relatively happy and well-adjusted teenager, Ryan is engaged in a level of self-destruction and rebellion that horrifies his family. This is from his mother, an update this last April:

Thank you SO much for praying for Ryan…we haven’t talked to him since June(’07)…though he did send us an obscene, evil e-mail disowning us in November, broke into our house in December, and has sent threatening text messages. All of it is like it is from someone we don’t know…a completely different person. We heard that he tried to kill himself…and we know he is living with a boyfriend…and we know he was just in jail for 5 days recently for domestic violence. We also know he is using, and most likely making, meth. It is heartbreaking. So we grieve, and continue to pray that he will return to the Lord.

Please. Whatever you’re doing this morning, would you take a few minutes and lift Ryan up? The man’s under a lot of delusion right now, probable demonic influence (remind me to tell you the South Central LA story some time), and I fear for what God might allow to bounce this kid on his butt in order to bring him back to Him.

If you’d also do me a favor and pass this prayer request along to other groups of prayer warriors, I’d appreciate that.  The devastation in these lives has been heartbreaking.

Thanks, guys.


~ by WriterRand on June 6, 2008.

5 Responses to “Ryan”

  1. I just prayed and will continue to pray for Ryan, his boyfriend, and his family. This is really heartbreaking. Thanks for sharing, brother.

  2. I too have prayed for Ryan and his parents.

    Although this does not always happen, it is common for people to not only “come out’ but do so with a lot of built up anger and hostility towards their parents, the church etc.

    Why does this happen?

    There are a number of reasons – the “outing” may just be one part of an overall form of rebellion against God and any other authority. Sometimes a person who has secretly struggled with SSA all his life and a zillion times asking “Why me God?” then blames God and his parents for his situation, rejecting them before he himself can suffer any rejection. In others words it is like “I’m going to shoot you before you shoot me” sort of emotional defensive reaction.

    Sadly there is usually other self-destructive behavior that goes along with it – drugs, drunkenness, multiple partners and so forth.

    Eventually (if he doesn’t die first) he will hit rock bottom and cry for help. THAT is when true Christians need to be ready to come to his aid to help him repent and seek help.

    Keep praying. In the mean time, his parents need to educate themselves in how to handle this. Feel free to have them contact me and I’ll send a recommended reading list.

    Grace & Peace,


  3. Rik,

    Thanks so much for posting that comment!! I remember when I came out to my mom many years ago, she cried and worried so much for me. I interpreted that as a sign of war and treated her like CRAP!! I basically made her life hell. It breaks my heart looking back now, but I know she has forgiven me, God has forgiven me, and I’ve forgiven myself. Your comment is… humbling, actually. I reminds me to not only thank God for saving me from that but to also love on my mom and thank her for never turning her back on me.

    Thanks again!!

  4. I will also be praying for Ryan. From my experience reaching out to drug abusers, I would say his bizarre words and actions follow a sadly typical pattern. I would lovingly keep trying to reach out to someone like that even though he repeatedly lies, hurls extreme insults for no apparent reason, and tries to grab money in every way possible.

    Seriously, it is often darkest right before the dawn. Although I would NEVER wish this on Ryan, one of my friends became a Christian after he nearly died from an overdose. I pray Ryan will become aware of how far he has fallen, see his need for a savior, and turn to Jesus!

  5. BTW, the other Ryan who lived with you is doing well. He and his girlfriend will be getting married in a few weeks and then living in California where they have joined a church.

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